When fun trumps fashion
04/15/2011
To buy a Wonder Woman swimsuit or not to buy a Wonder Woman swimsuit, that is the question.
I stumbled upon this rare find while browsing swimoutlet.com for a sporty Nike tankini. (Fellas, that’s a bikini minus the itsy bitsy). After nothing met my criteria…practical, classy, simple, preferably black, sans doo-dads and swimmable…I ventured into one-piece options. Poor one pieces. They’re so underrated. Personally, I’m a fan. Two pieces have their place in the universe of swimwear, but they’re predictable. Expected. That settled it. I would remain the one-piece poster girl.
And then it appeared. The Splish brand “Awesome Girl” swimsuit, complete with a lightening bolt. Images of Lynda Carter popped into my head. I had flashbacks of the Wonder Woman Underoos I adored as a 5-year old—crying when they were in the washer. I found my suit! I smiled. Wider than I should have at a computer screen.
No no no no no no no no no. This is not a suit Tara Maras would buy. This meets none of the criteria on this nicely organized list of criteria sitting next to my computer. None. This is ridiculous. Absurd. Bright. Lightening bolty. Loud. Unprofessional. Impractical. Wonder Womanish.
But I love it.
No no no no no no no no no. I don’t live in Venice Beach. I don’t perform in “O.”I don’t know how I feel about stars on my butt. I don’t have the accessories (indestructible bracelet, red boots). I’m not proficient in hand-to-hand combat and the art of tactical warfare. I don’t even have a swimming pool. Is this my mid-life crisis?
But I still love it.
So I made a deal with myself. If after 24 hours I still had the burning need to own this suit of wonder, I would buy it. Then it would be a well-thought-out, non-impulsive, practical purchase. Right? Right.
Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick tock. The 24-hour mark arrived. I pointed, clicked and submitted my order.
But it will never fit. No way. Not a chance of ordering a swimsuit online and having it fit. No problem. I’ll just return it and the fun will be over. Whew, glad I have an out.
Of course, you can guess how the story ends. It arrived. It fit perfectly. I’m wearing it as I type. (Not really…). I’ve decided this is swimoutlet.com’s way of telling me that it’s okay to have a little fun…be a little impractical…that less doesn’t always have to be fabulous. Okay swimoutlet.com. Just this once.
Now, about that pool…
Me. The Wagon. Falling off.
06/26/2010
I went shopping.
It wasn’t a credit card spree of epic proportions, not that I’ve ever been that kind of gal, but my purchases definitely fell more into the “want” than the “need” category. I didn’t pack my trunk full of fancy shopping bags either. In fact, my purchases fit in my purse. Hold the plastic bags (at least I was environmentally friendly!). Nonetheless, I broke my own rule of shopping for needs only. So now here we sit, in my own online confessional. “Forgive me father, for I have sinned…”
We’ve entered the wear-as-few-clothes-as-possible season here in hot Las Vegas. Read: tank top time. My two Gap tanks have seen better days. One black, one white, they look great after they’re washed and dried. However, five minutes after being on my bod they “grow,” get annoyingly bunchy and just generally make me look and feel like a schlup. Adding a nice necklace and lipstick doesn’t help. It just makes me feel like a schlup wearing a nice necklace and lipstick.
A hard core minimalist would just deal. Frankly, life is too short to just deal in some cases, and I refuse to go through summer feeling frumpy when the problem can be handled with $20. So I got myself to T.J.Maxx and picked out two new tanks, one black, one gray, with a touch of stretch. Problem solved. The old tanks are now in the Goodwill bag. I’ve maintained the size of my wardrobe and feel great telling you about it in my new non-schlupy black top, which, by the way, looks super with a nice necklace and lipstick…
…and my new earrings.
Oh, didn’t I mention I also bought earrings?
There’s no justifying it. Nothing I type can rationalize it. Bottom line: I saw them, I loved them, I bought them.
They look great with the gray tank. With the black tank too. I’ve worn them three times already. Ummm, I think I’ll stop while I’m ahead.
Sometimes a girl’s just gotta be a girl! I’ve accepted it. I’m moving on.
Have you had weak moments this summer? What have you purchased that, let’s be honest, you could have done without. Discuss amongst yourself in the comments section. I’ll pop in to add commentary too!
Minimalist Milestone: No mouse in my house
04/23/2010
Over the years I’ve been a PC user, Mac user, desktop user, laptop user. Sometimes in combination. Sometimes exclusively. There’s been one common thread – a mouse. Over the years I’ve been a wired mouse user, wireless mouse user. You get the point. There’s always been a mouse in my house.
Knowing what you now know, you can imagine my horror when my Logitech wireless mouse keeled over last week. I hit the reset button, changed the battery, disassembled it, blew out toast crumbs and checked for software updates. I did everything but give the thing cheese. I called in the coroner – my husband. He confirmed my fears. Dead mouse.
Forced to use to my laptop’s awkward touch screen thingy, I did a search of the latest mouses (mice? meese?). Desiring to get up close and personal with my replacement mouse, I ventured to Office Depot and selected an iHome notebook mouse. It was compact, cute and the right price. I should have known way better. One whirl with that piece-o-junk and I was cursing the entire mouse species.
Back in the box it went, back to Office Depot I went. Evidently a mouse, even an inferior one, is considered a technology item, which meant my only option was to exchange it. I showed extreme displeasure and after strongly suggesting they refund my cash, walked out with a lame merchandise credit. Great. You win Office Depot. Score one for you. But I digress…
Back at home and so totally over all things mouse, I decided to school up on my trackpad. I endured the video tutorial and futzed around with settings. So much from one little trackpad! Options for track speed, double-click speed, swipe to navigate, tap to click, one-two-three-four finger choices. Wowie!
My house has been without a mouse for five days now. I continue to be impressed with the fine little piece of technology that had been sitting idle at my fingertips all along. I no longer “need” a mouse. I’m enjoying my more streamlined desk setup and am paying much closer attention to what’s in front of me.
Try it out. I think you’ll also realize everything you need is within easy reach.
Now Brewing: Delayed Gratification
04/20/2010
I love my Starbucks mug. For years it has been my go-to vessel for my daily cuppacoffee. Like a trained forester – or kindergartener on a field trip – can count a tree’s rings to determine age, I can count my mug’s scratches, permanent coffee stains and near-fatal dings to confirm that it’s had six years of hard-core use. (The 2004 copyright on the side confirms my scientific analysis.) Something about its simple no-nonsense design screams “dependable,” “hard-working,” “authentic” and “subtle,” qualities I admire in my coffee mugs, others and aspire to for myself.
My dad gave me this mug. He’s intuitive. He knew he was on to something.
Sadly, despite my best efforts to follow the care instructions (“Top rack dishwasher safe. Do not microwave.”), avoid drops of more than four feet (not hard, I’m only slightly taller) and not lose this appendage, the end is near. A month ago I dropped it on the garage floor. It suffered a terminal blow. The trusty lid kept the coffee inside, but the impact was too much for the exterior. There was no immediate seepage and I continue to use it daily, but I’ve begun to notice a little bubble action (think washing machine overflowing with suds) from the injury site.
Resigned to the fact that I’ll be adding this to the landfill (non-recyclable), I’ve contemplated next moves. The obvious option is to replace it immediately. Instead, I’m delaying gratification and watching the mail. Turns out, my birthday is right around the corner. When my sister asked, “What do you want?” I didn’t respond with the usual, “Dunno. Don’t need anything. Surprise me with a gift card.” Instead I indicated interest in a Starbucks card (Sister, hint hint if you’re reading!).
Maybe the mailman will come bearing a Starbucks card from the midwest. If not, no problem. I’ll give myself a new mug for my birthday. I’m thinking stainless steel. It’s the new black. I intend for it to last until 2016 and beyond…
I’m steamed! Spend less on appliances
04/11/2010
I dislike buying irons nearly as much as I dislike ironing. “Hate” isn’t too strong a word. I hate buying irons. I hate ironing.
Society says we shouldn’t walk around with totally wrinkled clothes. I’m fine with that. I like to look neat. My technique of laying clothes flat to dry with the help of the ceiling fan is rather amazing, but minimal ironing is still required.
Thinking I’ve got this silly task nearly beat, you can imagine my disgust when I realized I’d have to think more about ironing than I cared to on this beautiful Southern Nevada Sunday. This morning my Black & Decker looked me square in the eyes, sputtered pond-colored water and decided its days of heating up were done.
I know what you’re thinking. “She should run vinegar through it.” I have. Several times. To the point where I had to wear a painter’s mask because the fumes were so strong. Bottom line, appliances are designed to break and require a replacement.
This I believe.
No one can convince me otherwise.
It’s a shame things aren’t made like they used to be and we live in a disposable world are crap.
This isn’t the first iron I’ll be committing to the landfill. It will join those that have gone before it, plus the vacuums, leaf blowers, can openers and mixers that met a similar fate. I’ve replaced them all several times. I’m not 85.
I now swear by my crank can opener (Marines don’t mess around, why should I?), $6 hand mixer (the $200 stand mixer I got as a shower gift died years ago) and $50 Dirt Devil that I bought to replace the Eureka that cost five times as much and lasted 18 months.
Fully expecting that I’ll be browsing irons again by 2012, I went with the $29 Shark. I’ve gone the $79 route. Not worth it. The Shark’s debut performance went well and I’m glad I didn’t spend more.
The morale of the story? I will spend extra for quality clothes (Lucy pants!) because they last longer. Appliances have yet to impress me. Less (money) is fabulous where irons are concerned.
